Miloš Jakeš (last General Secretary of the Czechoslovak Comm

[Boss]

Why was Miloš Jakeš permitted to drink alcohol in 5th grade?
He was already 18 years old.

Did you know that Miloš Jakeš was a child prodigy?
At age 5, his vocabulary was the same as at age 50.

A newsboy stands on the sidewalk, calling: "Buy a lottery ticket, the third prize is a Škoda Favorit."
One passer-by asks, "If the third prize is a car, what is the second?" The newsboy tells him: "It's ten minutes of confidential conversation with the general secretary, Miloš Jakeš."
Conversation with Jakeš?" says the man, "Why, I'd rather kick him in the backside!!"
That's the first prize."

At a Central Committee news conference for journalists from friendly countries, a Cuban reporter asked "How is Communism doing in Czechoslovakia?"
Well, you yourself know the answer, but you can't write it as I say it," says General Secretary Miloš Jakeš, "Communism in Czechoslovakia is up the ass (a colloquial expression meaning...well the meaning is obvious)."
The next day, a banner headline appears in the Cuban paper: "In Czechoslovakia, Communism is within reach."

A Czechoslovak delegation headed by Miloš Jakeš visited Argentina. During the whole trip, Jakes had nothing to say, but just before departure, he asked through a translator, "Please tell me how it is possible that you have 80% illiteracy and yet everything is so clean and efficient.
The Argentine president answered, "That's easy, Secretary Jakeš, we don't put them in the government."

At an auto show, the Škoda is shown to the public for the first time. Naturally, government representatives are present. The director of the Škoda company says to Miloš Jakeš: "Dear General Secretary of the Communist Party it would be an honor if we could give you the first new Škoda free!!!"
That's impossible," says Jakeš, "That would be bribery, which is in direct opposition to the principles of our developed socialist society!"
All right," says the director, "We'll give it to you for symbolic price 10Kčs."
That's different," says Jakeš and he searches his pockets. Finally he pulls out a bill and says "All I've got is a twenty. Just give me two."